Star Status: Mickey Rourke
He's riding a wave of Oscar-ready comeback predictions for The Wrestler, but how does Mickey Rourke score in the return of the Chimpomatic Star Status Movie Maths Generator?
It's been a while since we had a go at this, so in case you've forgotten, here are the rules again: it's 10 points for a Hit, 5 for a Maybe and 1 for a Miss... No TV movies, just cinema releases to date. We add it all up, cross-reference the results with some complicated science bits, and hey presto! A comprehensive hit-rate analysis showing how much of their catalogue is actually worth watching.
The Wrestler (2008) .... Randy 'The Ram' Robinson HIT
Stormbreaker (2006) .... Darrius Sayle MAYBE
Domino (2005) .... Ed Mosbey MISS
Sin City (2005) .... Marv HIT
Man on Fire (2004) .... Jordan MISS
Once Upon a Time in Mexico (2003) .... Billy MISS
Masked and Anonymous (2003) .... Edmund MAYBE
Spun (2002) .... The Cook HIT
Picture Claire (2001) .... Eddie MISS
They Crawl (2001) .... Tiny Frakes MISS
The Pledge (2001) .... Jim Olstad HIT
Get Carter (2000) .... Cyrus Paice MISS
Animal Factory (2000) .... Jan the Actress HIT
Shades (1999) .... Paul S. Sullivan MISS
Out in Fifty (1999) .... Jack Bracken MISS
Shergar (1999) .... Gavin O'Rourke MISS
Cousin Joey (1999) MISS
Thursday (1998) .... Kasarov MISS
Point Blank (1998) .... Rudy Ray MISS
Buffalo '66 (1998) .... The Bookie HIT
The Rainmaker (1997) .... Bruiser Stone HIT
Love in Paris (1997) .... John Gray ... aka 9 1/2 Weeks II MISS
Double Team (1997) .... Stavros MISS
Bullet (1996) .... Butch 'Bullet' Stein MISS
Exit in Red (1996) .... Ed Altman MISS
Fall Time (1995) .... Florence MISS
F.T.W. (1994) .... Frank T. Wells MISS
White Sands (1992) .... Gorman Lennox MISS
Harley Davidson and the Marlboro Man (1991) .... Harley Davidson MAYBE
Desperate Hours (1990) .... Michael Bosworth MAYBE
Wild Orchid (1989) .... James Wheeler MISS
Johnny Handsome (1989) .... John Sedley a.ka. Johnny Handsome / Johnny Mitchell MISS
Francesco (1989) .... Francesco MISS
Homeboy (1988) .... Johnny Walker MISS
A Prayer for the Dying (1987) .... Martin Fallon HIT
Barfly (1987) .... Henry Chinaski HIT
Angel Heart (1987) .... Harry Angel HIT
Nine 1/2 Weeks (1986) .... John HIT
Year of the Dragon (1985) .... Capt. Stanley White HIT
The Pope of Greenwich Village (1984) .... Charlie HIT
Eureka (1984) .... Aurelio D'Amato HIT
Rumble Fish (1983) .... The Motorcycle Boy HIT
Diner (1982) .... Robert 'Boogie' Sheftell HIT
Body Heat (1981) .... Teddy Lewis HIT
Heaven's Gate (1980) .... Nick Ray MAYBE
Fade to Black (1980) .... Richie MAYBE
1941 (1979) .... Pvt. Reese MAYBE
HIT 17
MISS 23
MAYBE 7
So that's 212 points out of a possible 470
Mickey Rourke: you have scored 45.1%
If you dare make a purchase, you can do so here, allowing Chimpomatic to profit from his loss. Check back next Thursday for more Star Status movie maths. Same Chimp Channel, same Chimp Time...